Today I want to share with you a post from one of my favorite bloggers Marc and Angel from http://www.marcandangel.com/. And in this post, they are talking about friends that are worth keeping.
As I am growing older, I am reminded that I need to think carefully of the friends I have and keeping them close to me and who I should really fight for. To read more about friends worth fighting for go to 10 Types of Friends Worth Fighting For.
Also, you can be able to read the post here - I took it from their website to share with you.
"1. Friends who make time for each other.
There are countless intricacies to every great friendship, but the foundation is always incredibly
simple: making time for each other. The key is to hang in, stay
connected, fight for them, and let them fight for you. Don’t walk away
when the going gets a little tough, don’t be distracted too easily,
don’t be too busy or tired, and don’t take them for granted. Friends
are part of the glue that holds life and happiness together. It’s
powerful stuff!
So put down the smart phone, close the laptop and enjoy each other’s company, face to face, the old fashioned way.
There are few joys that equal a good conversation, a genuine laugh, a
long walk, a friendly dance, or a big hug shared by two people who care
about each other. Sometimes the most ordinary things can be made
extraordinary simply by doing them with the right people. You know
this! Choose to be around these people, and choose to make the most of
your time together.
2. Friends who are willing to put in the necessary effort.
Healthy, long-term friendships are amazing, but rarely easygoing 24/7. Why? Because they require flexibility and compromise.
Two different people will always have two slightly different
perspectives about the same situation. Resisting this truth and seeing
the hard times as immediate evidence that something is catastrophically
wrong, or that you’re supposed to see eye-to-eye on everything, only
aggravates the difficulties. By contrast, finding the willingness to view the challenges as learning opportunities will give you the energy and strength you need to continue to move forward and grow your friendship for decades to come.
3. Friends who believe in each other.
Sometimes we see our worst selves…. our most vulnerable and weak
selves. We need someone else to get close enough to tell us we’re
wrong. Someone we trust. That’s what true friends are for.
Simply believing in another person, and showing it in words and deeds
on a consistent basis, can make a HUGE difference in their life.
Several studies of people who grew up in dysfunctional homes but who
grew up to be happy and successful show that the one thing they had in
common was someone who believed in them. Be this ‘someone’ for those
you care about. Support their dreams. Participate with them. Cheer
for them. Be nothing but encouraging. Whether they actually follow
through with their present dreams, or completely change their minds, is
irrelevant; your belief in them is of infinite importance, either way. (Read The Mastery of Love.)
4. Friends who face challenges and weaknesses together.
When we honestly ask ourselves which friends have helped us the most,
we often find that it’s those special few who, instead of giving lots
of advice, specific solutions, or quick cures, have chosen rather to
share in our challenges and touch our wounds with a listening ear and a
loving heart.
The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of confusion, who
can stay with us in an hour of pain and mourning, who can tolerate not
knowing or having all the answers, not curing and fixing everything in
an instant, and instead simply face the reality of our momentary
powerlessness with us, that is a friend worth fighting for.
5. Friends who are gentle and compassionate through life’s changes.
Be gentle and compassionate with your friends as they evolve and
change. Mother Nature opens millions of flowers every day without
forcing the buds. Let this be a reminder not to be forceful with those
you care about, but to simply give them enough light and love, and an
opportunity to grow naturally.
Ultimately, how far you go in life depends on your willingness to be
helpful to the young, respectful to the aged, tender with the hurt,
supportive of the striving, and tolerant of those who are weaker or
stronger than the majority. Because we wear many hats throughout the
course of our lives, at some point in your life you will have been all
of these people, and the same is true for your friends.
6. Friends who support each other’s growth.
No human being is your friend who demands your silence or denies your right to grow.
Healthy friendships always move in the direction of personal growth:
for the relationship as a whole and for each individual in it. A desire
to impede the growth of the other for one’s personal comfort is an
expression of fear.
When you connect with a true friend, this person helps you find the
best in yourself. In this way, neither of you actually meet the best in
each other; you both grow into your best selves by spending time
together and nurturing each other’s growth.
7. Friends who tell the truth.
Subconsciously, many of us prefer gentle lies to hard truths. But make no mistake, in the end it’s better to be hurt by the truth than comforted by a lie. Friendships based on lies always die young.
Lying is a cumulative process too. So be careful. What starts as a
small, seemingly innocent lie (possibly even with the intention of not
hurting anyone) quickly spirals into a mounting fairytale where the
biggest factor preventing you from sharing the truth is the unwanted
reputation of being known as a liar.
Don’t do this. Don’t hide behind lies. Deal with the truth, learn
the lessons, endure the consequences of reality, and move your
friendship forward.
8. Friends who are tolerant of each other’s inevitable mood swings.
Giving your friends the space to save face, and not taking things
personally, when they’re occasionally upset, cranky or having a bad day
is a priceless gift.
Truth be told, what others say and do is often based entirely on their own self-reflection.
When a friend who is angry and upset speaks to you, and you
nevertheless remain very present and continue to treat them with
kindness and respect, you place yourself in a position of great power.
You become a means for the situation to be graciously diffused and
healed.
My grandmother once told me, “When somebody backs themselves into a
corner, look the other way until they get themselves out; and then act
as though it never happened.” Allowing a friend to save face in this
way, and not reminding them of what they already know is not their most
intelligent behavior, is an act of great kindness. This is possible
when you realize that people behave in such ways because they are in a
place of momentary suffering. People react to their own thoughts and
feelings and their behavior often has nothing directly to do with you.
9. Friends who work out their issues with each other, not with others.
This may seem obvious, but these days it’s worth mentioning: NEVER
post negatively about a friend on social media. Fourteen-year-old
school kids post negatively about their friends on social media. It’s a
catty way to get attention and vent, when the emotionally healthy
response is to talk your grievances over with them directly when the
time is right.
Don’t fall into the trap of getting others on your side either,
because healthy friendships only have one side – it’s called mutual
respect.
Furthermore, friendships and their intricacies don’t always make
sense, especially from the outside. So don’t let outsiders run your
friendship for you. If you’re having an issue with a friend, work it
out with THEM and no one else. (Angel and I discuss this in more detail in the “Relationships” chapter of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)
10. Friends who are faithful from a distance.
Sometimes life puts geographic barriers between you and a good
friend. But growing apart geographically doesn’t change the fact that
for a long time you two grew side by side; your roots will always be
tangled. Knowing this, embracing it, and making the best of it… that’s a
clear sign of true friendship.
In the end, this ‘true’ kind of friendship is a promise made in the
heart – silent, unwritten, unbreakable by distance, and unchangeable by
time. "
I love marcandangel's website and anytime you have a chance, check it out for practical living tips to get you through your day. To read more, go to http://www.marcandangel.com/
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